Not My Baby Anymore

It’s Wednesday about 5:30pm and I realize I don’t have a baby anymore.

I am fighting to hold back the tears.

Unless you’ve gone through it, there is no possible way to understand the flood of emotions.

I have 8 kids.

Ammon’s my youngest.

He’s 6, 7 in September.

My little caboose.

My back seat buddy.

We were having a fun family day at Lagoon Amusement Park.

Riding rides. Watching the kids ride rides.

Then we cooled off at Lagoon-A-Beach.

Playing in the Kiddie Swim area was fun.

Sliding down the water slides.

Walking under the waterfall.

Swinging on the water swings.

Then, he wanted more.

What about trying that big slide with my big brothers and sisters?

Are you sure? What if you fall off the tube?

I won’t fall.

Okay, if you’re sure.

He goes down, through 5 pool areas and 5 slide areas.

He doesn’t fall and he’s smiling.

He wants to go again.

Mom, will you go with me this time?

Do you want me to carry your tube?

No, I can.

We go up and up and up, many, many, many steps.

Do you want me to help you get on?

No, I can do it.

I watch him leave in front of me.

I see him swoosh into the first pool area.

And, he f a l l s. He’s all the way under the water.

I gasp!

He stands up and looks around.

I yell! Ammon, are you okay?

Yeah mom! I’m getting back on.

I follow him down.

He’s laughing and smiling and is so b i g.

We get to the bottom.

Can we go again mom?


Again mom?


Just 2 more times mom, please?

Okay, just 2 more.

Were you scared when you fell?

No, it was fun!

He’s my last one. How will I ever let go?

I’m linking to:

Tuesdays Unwrapped at Chatting at the Sky

{ 4 comments… add one }
  • Lisa July 19, 2010, 10:53 pm

    Well said and so touching. Beautiful words you wrote here. <3

  • Christine Aldinger July 20, 2010, 3:53 am

    well for me my youngest moved 1100 miles away i didn’t have much choice in letting go but it was hard and took alot time….to this day after 6 yrs when he comes home i cry and when he leaves i cry..gosh i am crying typing this…yeah i miss my youngest…alot

  • down bedding July 20, 2010, 8:22 am

    both me and my boyfriend are the youngest, we are both the exploring kind and wants to go far far away from home..but this is very touching, I can feel in the post how my mom would feel, and it makes me sad

  • Amanda Formaro July 20, 2010, 5:51 pm

    Oh I so know how you feel! You have 8 kids? Wow! I have 4 and my youngest is 11. He’s still my buddy, but he’s getting that preteen attitude now and again. UGH Boohoo! We can feel sorry for each other! HUGS

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge

About Me | Disclosure Policy | Copyright Policy | Privacy Policy | Contact Me